"You're a Failure"

If you're like most adults, you or someone you know has heard this at some point in your life... Maybe even from yourself.  So, let me start by saying, "you are absolutely NOT a failure!"

Your life is a sum total of your choices multiplied by your efforts.  Your choices determine your circumstances, and your effort determines your success or failure within those circumstances.  Your circumstances are maximized by making good choices, and your success is maximized by the amount of effort you exert within your circumstance.  Each time you make a good choice you improve your circumstance and overall success potential is elevated.  Similarly, each time you make an extra effort, your level of success within your circumstance is elevated.  In other words, effort without good choices may not lead to success.  The two are symbiotic.

For example:

1.  You are born with a natural ability (circumstance).

2.  You choose to focus your efforts on enhancing that particular ability (effort).

3.  Your level of success is likely very high.

Conversely...

1.  You are born with a natural ability.

2.  You choose to focus your efforts on something you love, rather than that natural ability.  But, you focus no more effort than you would have in the first scenario.  

3.  Your level of success will likely be lower.

Or...

1.  You are born with a natural ability.

2.  You choose to relax and depend upon your natural abilities... You don't feel you "need" to work as hard because you're better than most without trying, so you do only what is required.

3.  Your level of success will likely be lower.

To balance things out, you must always factor the following into your life equation:

Where circumstance is lacking, effort must increase, and where effort is lacking, circumstance must increase (enter LUCK, stage left).  

At this point, you may be saying, "baloney" (or some similar expletive, and yes I know that baloney is actually spelled "bologna").  If that's you, you are probably focusing your effort on making another excuse for your lack of success - I have a disability, I have four children to support, I'm a single parent, I have an abusive partner, I was born poor, I'm discriminated against, my boss/coach/professor doesn't like me, etc.  Please note - ALL excuses are GOOD excuses, but they are still excuses... Period.

If you agree your personal success is a direct result of your personal choices and effort contributed, you are probably well on your way to achieving your vision of success.  Now, take an inventory of yourself.  Where are you?  What are your strengths?  Are you focusing your efforts on your strengths?  How much effort are you exerting?  Then, adjust accordingly using the life formula provided earlier - make a plan, set a goal, dream a little, and never give up.

Whatever you do... Please do me a little personal favor... Don't whine and moan about how "life isn't fair" or mumble under your breath about how much you think you suck.  Remember instead... 
You are NOT a failure until you STOP trying.  
Most importantly, APPRECIATE EVERYTHING YOU HAVE RIGHT NOW!